Attack Value: 5
Card Text: Attack (Target Lock): Spend your target lock and discard this card to perform this attack. You may change up to three of your blank results to <eyeball> results
Usage: I have a bad habit of not reading stuff closely until I have to explain it to somebody else. I don't know, that's not entirely accurate- I have a bad habit of not fully understanding something until I have to explain it to somebody else. On some things. Not everything- some stuff I'm forced to figure it out and I never really ever have to explain it, but many things I generally read or learn just enough to do whatever's necessary to make it work for me and rarely dig much deeper.
Case in point? Advanced Proton Torpedoes.
I remember seeing the card text for this back when it was initially released and kinda went, "Sheesh- ok, I gotta have a Target Lock and Focus to make that fully worthwhile, but if I do, it's a pretty guaranteed butt-kicking." And never really went any farther than that with it.
What completely slipped right past me was that it was an Attack 5 Secondary Weapon.
Now, admittedly, I doubt my life would be any less complete if I'd not started this blog and started to write this article which forced me to read this card more closely, but it is kind of a big deal.
Yeah, it's expensive, there's no denying that, and at a passing glance, the card text isn't no-brainer, slam dunk great either. The thing is though, when you combine those 5 red dice with the card text that it starts to make some dollars to you.
First, let me preface the following by saying I don't know that this is an option for just any old ship that can take torps. It's going to work pretty decently on just about any ship with torp tubes, but it definitely works better in some lists than others, so if you're ever on the fence about taking Advanced Torps over regular torps, maybe consider some of the following points for your selection criteria.
I don't find Jeff Foxworthy particularly insightful or hilarious- I'm not mad at the guy, I'm just not a big fan, but his, "... You might be a redneck", bit kinda works here, so I'm going to steal it and adapt it. Don't feel bad for him- he made a ton of dough on that show Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader which subsequently was ripped off from Howard Stern, so it's come-uppance anyway.
If yer runnin' one o' them lists that generates Focus tokens (Katarn, Lando, Dries, etc.) like my dawgs generate hot dog farts, you might want to use Advanced Proton Torpedoes.
I mean look, it makes sense, right? There are only four different results on an Attack die- crit, hit, eyeball, and blank. If you're throwing five dice and turning 3 possible blanks into eyeballs, and you've got Focus tokens flying around your ships willy-nilly, you're very, very likely to hit something very, very hard.
If yer TCB in a BTL listenin' to BTO, you might want to use Advanced Proton Torpedoes.
Having 5 Attack dice at Range 1 isn't all that spectacular in a X-Wing, which of course would normally generate 4 Attack dice at Range 1 anyway, but a Y-Wing? Well, that Y-Wing's only generating 3 Attack dice at Range 1, so this is a fairly significant boost in this context. Dig on the fact that you can roll a Goldie with Advanced Proton Torpedoes for only 24 points. One trick pony? Sure. But you're going to hurt something pretty hard with that one trick. Giddy up.
And yeah, the rednecks where I live most definitely do use the term TCB in casual conversation, but will nearly always explain to you that TCB stands for "Takin' Care of Business" even if they just explained to you what it meant the day previous. BTO is of course Bachman Turner Overdrive who wrote the song, "Takin' Care of Business (who the hell knew they had wireless mics in 1974?)." If I gotta explain to you what a BTL is, you're playing the wrong game. :)
Other honorable mentions go to Ibitsam, Krassis Trelix (with Slave I title, of course), and yeah, even Wedge Antilles- dig that Wedge's card text doesn't make any mention of a a primary attack, just an attack, then sick him on a Shuttle. Nastiness right there. Major Rhymer, the hard rhymer, as some of you bikini aficionados pointed out in comments on his preview article makes good use of the Advanced Proton Torpedoes as he increases their range to 2. Any run-of-the-mill Bomber flying alongside Jonas can make good use of them or if you want to be a little stealthy, how about a run-of-the-mill Bomber with Jendon in the ST-321? "Oh, I don't know- I guess... I guess... oh, I guess Scimitar Squadron will just Focus..." Yeah, I guess so- until Jendon throws him a Target Lock and he drops Focused Advanced Proton Torpedoes on some poor sucker, right?